Friday Whiteboard Quote - Week of April 3

"The reason why we exist, beyond the rivets, beyond money, beyond color, beyond creed, beyond failure, beyond exams passed, beyond whether you have kids or don't have kids, whether you get married, beyond all aspirations, beyond all of that which leaves us when we're in the ground, is the notion that you are loved unconditionally, permanently, eternally, forever, as you are." Charlie Mackesy

I have never really understood why it's called Good Friday. Is it supposed to be good that this is the day that Jesus was nailed to the cross and died in excruciating (literally Latin for "torture on a cross") pain? Surely not, right? My only guess is that it's good because we know the story's ending.  

If you don't believe the story, that's fine too – I'm not much into religion (where it's easy for the want of power to overshadow and demolish the essence of the teachings) myself. What I do enjoy believing is that someone could have walked this earth, if you are certain he did that's fine too, with unconditional love in the face of unspeakable prejudice (pre-judgement) and vitriol. Someone who is believed to have uttered, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do" with his fading breath.  

Love.  

I guess that's why today is an especially good Friday. It provides the opportunity for us to stop and remember that we are creatures who are loved and are capable of loving. That's why I love this snippet from one of my favorite authors, Charlie Mackesy (check out his book "The Boy, The Mole, The Fox, and The Horse" for a thought-provoking tale of life):  

https://video.wixstatic.com/video/446a6c_85f1eb15da354c0591083547a819b2dc/1080p/mp4/file.mp4

Wednesday Whiteboard Quote: Week of April 1

"Before fixing what you're looking at, Check what you're looking through." -The Book of Awakening

When I moved to Atlanta in 2022, I didn't have a job lined up and really no idea of what I wanted to do. I had a little money saved and a partner who was covering most of the big expenses, but I wasn't in a position to sit back and relax for 6 months to a year. I needed a J-O-B.  

As with most uncertain times, we rely on our friends and family to keep us grounded and steady. I remember one friend who would regularly call me during this time to check in and see how I was. Inevitably, partway through the conversation, she would ask, "So how is the job search going? Have you found anything yet?" 

After a few times, this question started to get under my skin. You see, I have identified as someone who wants to appear as if I have it all together, and I HATE the feeling of someone feeling sorry for me. When I looked at her question through the lens of scarcity, fear, and smallness, it felt like she was questioning my adaptability and my work ethic. It felt like death

Luckily, I never acted on these initial mental reactions, which suggested I needed to defend myself, scold her for asking, and tell her I was a grown adult and to stop asking.

When I switched the perspective to see that she was only asking because she cared about me and wanted to make sure I was ok, the situation completely changed. The important thing here is that the situation changed WITHOUT ANYTHING ACTUALLY CHANGING OUTSIDE.  

How many aspects of our day-to-day lives could we apply this to? How many things outside are we always trying to fix, or do we say need to be just a little different? If we slow down, we'll see that what needs to change is our perspective. This should be a breath of fresh air because we have 100% control over our perspective. This is where our true freedom lies.  

As Rumi said, "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world, today I'm wise so I'm changing myself."  

Wednesday Whiteboard Quote - March 18

"I am astounded at how long it takes to discover... for the first time, the things I have learned... over and over again all my life." There is a Hole In My Sidewalk

Just as a bicep curl requires both the concentric (lifting) and eccentric (lowering) motion to grow muscles, learning is a product of both forgetting and remembering. It's just that in forgetting, we usually beat ourselves up.

"I've been working on this for weeks, and I still keep making the same error..."

"How many times is it going to take me messing this up to remember to do it correctly?!?!"

But beating ourselves up over forgetting is like only lifting the weight and never lowering it, all the while thinking we're inadequate because our muscles won't grow.

Forgetting is essential. Forgetting allows us the opportunity to remember, which rewires our mind and builds new neural pathways that eventually lead to learning. Eventually, this leads to a place of living the learning where we automatically remember.

Remember, forgetting is necessary for the process of learning.